Retrospectives for Life

Retrospectives. Have you ever heard that term before? I had not until just recently because I think it’s more of a term from the business/computer world. We reflect all the time. It’s built into our human nature. But sometimes we need to sit down and intentionally think retrospectively.

Retrospective: To take a look back at events that have already taken place.

People like to say we “learn by experience.” Is that really true? Think of a yo-yo dieter, or the person who has been married three or four times, or the last time you had a “discussion” with your child over the exact same thing done incorrectly. If we learned by experience, perhaps we wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. But we do. At least I do.

Dear Children…

Dear Children,

While I know you want so much to do what you want to do with no repercussions, I’m afraid such behavior will not happen under my watch.

There will be no throwing of legos under any circumstances; and throwing the ball over and over again at the bedroom door, while loud and exciting, is not being a good steward of the blessing of having your own bedroom.

It does not matter how much toothpaste you have on your toothbrush or where exactly it is placed on the toothbrush. And there is no need to fall on the floor in anguish when such a thing happens not to your liking.

Put the Baby Videos Away – They Don’t Work

infant (Photo credit: soupboy)

I’ve never owned a Baby Einstein video, nor checked one out from the library. And I am amazed at all of the videos that can be purchased or borrowed. Some claim to teach vocabulary; some claim to teach your infant foreign languages; some claim to develop musical abilities. Educational supplementation is a HUGE industry in our country, perhaps world-wide. Parents want what is best for their young children. If you, Parent, are like me, then you want your child to have opportunities that you never had growing up.

And there is nothing wrong with that.

But we have to be careful that we don’t buy (literally and figuratively) into the lies that media companies throw at us.

Judy S. DeLoach, along with her colleagues, has published research which seems to indicate that the infant media phenomenon is bogus, or at least not worth using to “try to get our children ahead”. Here is the abstract to her paper:

Teachable Moments for Parents: Yes, You Can Teach your Child!

So many parents think they are not equipped to teach their children. That is a lie from the pit of hell! God specifically tells us parents to teach our children diligently.

I’m not saying homeschool. Homeschooling does not work for every family. What I’m saying is, we parents need to wisely use the time we have with our kids.

I am going to start a new segment (or page) on my blog called, “Teachable Moments for Parents.” If you notice, it’s at the top of the page. I want to model simple and powerful ways parents can teach Truth to their children using every day situations.

Parents have teaching power and abilities beyond anything we can think or imagine if we would just pay attention to the promptings of the Holy Spirit. I’m not great at it. I miss opportunities all the time.

6 Ways to Freeze Time

Time goes by so fast. I look at my kids and think to myself, “Weren’t they just born yesterday? What happened?”  I get a little teary eyed…and then I think about all the free time I’ll have when the kids are more self-sufficient. Hmmm….

But back to the mushy gushy stuff.

Time is flying by. And I have asked those older and wiser then me, “What can I do to hold on to time? To make it precious?” And almost every one of them has told me the same thing: Take life one day at a time and make each day count.

Okay. So how does one DO that?!? This is what I have learned:

Hey! Let’s Pretend…

“You be the Mama and I’ll be the Daddy. These are our babies and we’ll put them in the stroller and take them to church. We’ll leave them in the nursery with Mrs. Lori and then we’ll go to church. They need to take a nap. Here is some food. Hey, you be Mrs. Andrea and I’ll be Pastor Chad. Let’s pray…”

Kids are awesome! And I am constantly amazed as I watch my children grow and learn.

Please, Cover the Kids!

The kids have had swimming lessons for the past 3 weeks. The program has been wonderful and geared right to the individual abilities of each child. There have only been 4 children in their class, with mine being half the class. There are 2 lessons before the one my kids take, so at times there are a few extra kids and parents around.

Once the lesson is over, the instructors send the kids back to the parents to get ready to go home. When my kids are finished, I dry them off, put their shirts or covers on and we leave the pool area. This, to me, seems to be a proper way to end a marvelous time of swimming.

However, the other day I looked up from my book to watch my daughter kick and blow bubbles and got an eye full

14 Truths Parents Need to Know

There are so many times that I feel defeated as a parent. It’s wearisome day in and day out to fix healthy meals, drive the kids where they need to go, and discipline in such a way that I don’t scar the children for life. Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of joyous times as well, and I love my job! But there are moments of frustration when I really need my own moment of intervention. And as a Christian, I forget to turn to the One who can intervene for me.

I need to tell myself Truth every day. I need it engraved upon my heart. As a Christian, I have the power of the Holy Spirit within me. Why am I walking around with a long face and defeated attitude? Lies. I keep listening to lies instead of meditating on God’s Truth. Maybe you need some of these Truths as well.

Mean Girls

from funnycollectionworld.blogspot.com

Girls can be so mean to each other. And it doesn’t help that there are movies that glorify the behavior. I think growing up in today’s world is much harder than when I was growing up. At least it seems to be more of a world of bullying and cat fights. That’s probably being a bit dramatic, but you know what I’m talk about.

When I was growing up, especially in middle school, I had 3 other girl friends and I never knew which of the girls were against who, who I wouldn’t be “allowed” to speak to that day, or heaven forbid, if it was ME that was to be ignored.

During the years I taught 4th and 5th grade, this seemed to be the behavior seen among younger girls. It made my heart so sad to see the selfish arguments the girls had. And I learned VERY quickly that one should NEVER put three girls together in a group. One will always be left out and that causes problems. So as a teacher I tried to do whatever I could to help the environment be one that did not increase the chances of mean behavior.

And there are also different “flavors,” if you will, of young girls. You have your Strong Leader who seems to dominate the relationships and direct the paths of those around her. There’s the Strong Follower who will do whatever it takes to keep the Strong Leader happy. The Onlooker is the young girl who is “left out” but wishes to be “in.” Lastly you have your Different Drum, who doesn’t care what the other girls say or do.

So how does a parent navigate their young daughter through such hard situations? That’s where I need your wisdom, Readers. My daughter is only 3 right now, but I want to be prepared, or help HER be prepared, for whatever might come her way. Some of this is personality driven, I know that. If my daughter was more shy, I’d probably worry more. But I don’t want my daughter to become the Strong Leader either, unless she leads with a heart belonging to the Lord.

For those of you who had daughters, how did you handle the “meanness” of girls? Because whether you homeschool or not, it’s going to show up anywhere. There is no getting around it.

Mama Mentoring

For those of you who have been following for a while, you know that I have a passion for mentoring, being a mentor AND one who is mentored. Relationships like these bring Titus 2 to life. But how does one go about getting relationships like this started?

I watch kids.